He Puts Me On A Cloud

*Sigh* Why does one man have the ability to irritate the living piss right out of me, but make me  happy all at the same time? This guy isn't even mine, but he makes me feel like no other man has been able to do. I've been contemplating walking away from this abnormal friendship that he and I have. Do I stay and wait? Or do I go and hopefully find someone who makes me feel like he does? I guarentee that there won't be a guy out that who can. Believe me, I've had three failed attempts. I don't want any more failed relationships.

Tonight, I texted this aforementioned man and asked him if he was moving to Wyoming. I know this seems like a completely random and ridiculous question, but about 30 minutes before this text message was sent, I had gotten another text message from a guy (who I've never met, but we've talked several times about getting together for dinner, It never worked out however), and he said that he had gotten a job in Wyoming....I thought he ment the city of Wyoming. Nope! definately ment the state. I had never ment this man before, but I was shocked. He doesn't know how long he's going to be there for, and for some reason my mind automatically went to...(I'm trying to think of a nickname for him, something like Mr.Big, but not so Sex and the City.....Well, for now let's call him Mr. Knight.) Mr.Knight, all I could think about was him packing up and moving to Wyoming and not telling me about it. I know it sounds dramatic, but that would truly devestate me. So this is where the random text message comes in. I occasionally like sending Mr. Knight a random text; I think it's a personality quirk that he secretly likes about me. Anyway, He  responded with a yes, and I told him that I hope he was joking becuase I'd come to Wyoming and punch him in the face.

We talked for a second, and he mentioned that he wanted to go to North Dakota and work in an oil field...I understand the need for change in someone's life, but an oil field really?? In North Dakota no less. They have the coldest winters ever! Then he asked me to come, "Come with me" was his response, and I got that instant feeling in my stomach. Ya know, it feels like someone lit off a fire cracker in there. It makes you nervous, but the good kind of nervous. I know he was probably only joking, but if he really seriously asked me to go with him - I would. I would in a heartbeat. Mind you, if this were a real situation I would tell him that we needed to go under the circumstances that I was more than a friend. I would not leave my family and friends behind to move half way across the country to live with my friend.

This is why I wish he were more open to discussing things. I try not to push it, or bring it up. Maybe he's just waiting for the right time to talk about it. Or, perhaps I have a severe case of wishful thinking.... If I could only read minds.